My Optometrist Appointment (and why I don't trust them).

I know a lot of people are afraid of the dentist, but for me, it's optometrists that make me extremely nervous. From start to finish, I feel like I'm in a house of horrors. 

I don't for one second believe that eye blowing machine is testing pressure. I don't think it's testing anything or than how much stress a human being can manage without it showing on their face. 

"You're going to feel a gust of air right on your eyeball. Not now. But soon," is a crazy thing to say to someone. So I wait. And wait. And wait. And just when you're thinking you missed it, BAM right on my cornea while I'm leaning into one of their contraptions. 

I also think all of their machines are fake, but that's a different story. 

My optometrist is nice. She seems very normal. She claims to have a family and home. But I can't trust anyone who would get involved specifically in other people's eyes. Truthfully, I feel the same way about dentists- why would you choose to do that- but for now I'll focus on eye doctors. 

My second grievance is with the "which one is better, this one, or this one, this one, or this one," dance that I internally scream through because "I DON'T KNOW. YOU CHOOSE." 

Usually, one is clearer than the other but after that, they're all kind of the same. "This one" flip "or that one." 

My theory is that it's a psy-op. The "optometrists" or whatever they really are, are testing to see if humans will lie when they're confused. Because I do. 

"That one?" 

"...Yeah." 

Or maybe they're intentionally just scrambling people. "This one" flip "Or that one." 

I bet there are only two options and they just act like there are hundreds. Everything is a game to these people. I feel like optometrists have a lot in common with that guy from The Saw because it really is giving, "Do you want to play a game?" and I don't like it. 

I wanted to ask how often those little lense things are cleaned. If they haven't been windexed lately, will that affect my prescription? This all seems very haphazard and not real. 

I value doctors and know vision is important but I think we need to look into optometrists and see what's going on there. 

Yesterday at the optometrist, I looked into one machine and it was a long highway with a T sign at the end. What was that for? 

I did enjoy the machine where you click the button when you see squiggly lines although I did not receive any results. What was the point? Did I get a high score or what? They should have a chart with names in lights so you know where you rank in your city. 

She had me read off many pieces of paper which I'm pretty sure was just free AI training.

I know there are also optometrists who give people drops that temporarily blur their vision. Weird! Someone on Facebook told me the optometrist touched her actual eyeball (illegal, no one is supposed to be touching eyes, even I know that). 

If your optometrist has had you look into a machine with weird things in it, let me know. I feel like they make those at home. I believe optometrists are just eccentric people who open stores in malls and office spaces to carry out their strange experiments. 

Yes, the glasses and contacts they hand out work but at what cost? How many of those tests are just a game to them? We have no way of knowing. Let's start asking questions. 

Optometrists, I see you. 

-Bunmi